Mid week humor from Bonnie Marron

 

Subject: Punography

 I tried to catch some fog. I mist.

 When chemists die, they barium.

 Jokes about German
 sausage are the wurst. 

 A soldier who survived mustard gas
and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

 I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid.
 He says he can stop any time.
 

 How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

 I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.
 Then it dawned on me.

 This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club,

 but  I'd never met herbivore.

 I'm reading a book about anti-gravity.
 I can't put it down.

 I did a theatrical performance about puns.
 It was a play on words .

 They told me I had type A blood,
 but it was a type-O.

 I didn't like my beard at first.
Then it grew on me.

 What does a clock do when it's hungry?
 It goes  back four seconds.

 I wondered why the baseball was getting
 bigger. Then it hit me!

 Broken pencils are pointless

 What do you call a dinosaur
 with an extensive vocabulary?
  A thesaurus.

  England has no kidney bank, 

 but it does have a Liverpool ..

  I used to be a banker, but
 then I lost interest.

  I dropped out of communism class
 because of lousy Marx.

  Cartoonist found dead in home.
 Details are sketchy.